5 weeks!

Kendal is 6 lbs 6 1/2 oz! She has started having a lot more awake time and is always awake and ready to eat when we get to the hospital. The nurses keep telling us that when babies have more awake time that the feeding thing will click soon. Kendal is still letting us know when she is not happy and is very noisy (especially when eating). Her eyelashes are starting to darken and her eyes seem to be more blue than any other color right now. She adores her daddy and looooves to look around and see what is going on. 

Lyla is 5 lbs. 2 oz!! She passed the 5 lb mark! Both girls have gained at least 2 lbs since birth! Lyla has started to pick up on her sister's vocal-ness. She is starting to let us know when she is mad, but she still endures annoying things well (like getting her nose suctioned out multiple times a day). Lyla's eyes seem to be darker than Kendal's--they seem more brown than blue. She is also starting to develop a double chin and doesn't seem as fragile. Lyla also adores her daddy, she just melts into him and is asleep in no time, but I think (hope) she might be a little bit of a mommy's girl too--she still loves to be held after nursing and just stares up at me. Their personalities are definitely coming out.

As far as feeding--we haven't really improved, but everyone says we just need to wait for it to "click". We are waiting and hoping it happens every day. 

Now that we have passed the one month mark and still going to the hospital every day--we are starting to feel the frustration towards this situation. Don't get me wrong, we are grateful the girls are healthy, safe, and well taken care of, we just didn't expect this to happen to us. There is the expectation when having a baby that you have your baby, you get to hold them whenever you want, and you take them home with you in a couple days--and this expectation is fulfilled by 99% of people. But we have fallen in to that small percentage that has their babies stay at the hospital for an extended period of time. Nobody WANTS their babies to have to stay at the hospital without them. I have been thinking about the pros and cons of a NICU stay...so here it goes.

Pros:

-I get tooons of time and advice on how to breastfeed. I was determined to breastfeed, but terrified because I had NO idea what I had to do. I have had occupational therapists, lactation consultants, and multiple nurses help me breastfeed and I feel confident with it now.

-The girls are well taken care of by extremely qualified staff

-I have time to get everything ready for them at home 

-We both get more sleep than if they were home, which has allowed me to heal from the c-section

Cons:

-I HATE being at home and sleeping at home without my babies

-Traveling to the hospital daily

-Pumping 10 times a day

-I feel like we miss out on some things because we aren't there all the time. Kendal was put in a swing when we weren't there a couple days ago--so we missed the first time she was in a swing, which might not seem like a big deal, but just reminds me of all the other things they may be doing that we miss out on.

-Sometimes it feels like the nurses know our babies better than we do and have more control over what happens with them, which makes me feel like less of a parent

-I feel like the girls are going to be huge and not babies anymore when they come home (although, that will not be the case)

I'm sure more feelings on the pros and cons side will come up, but these are the ones I can think of now. We cannot wait until we get to put the girls in their carseats, in our car, and bring them home. We think that is still weeks away--our goal is their due date now. If they are home by their due date, that is less than a month away. We are so in love with these girls and just want them with us, so we can be a family--at home.